Lessons We Learn From Our Pets

I read this quote by Christopher Hitchens on pets that every owner would have realised at some point.

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.”

That is a true statement. Because you chose the kind of dog or pup you want. However, a kitten chooses you to take care of it. A cat won’t allow just anybody to pet it. 

Isn’t that interesting, it almost feels like the cat is saying, “I don’t think you are good enough to be in my presence.”

Do I Have The Right To Complain

In our world, there is an abundance of love and a multitude of hate.
I have not seen extreme hatred but, I have also not felt a loving embrace.
Do I complain about the lack of love, or should I feel great for the absence of hate?

I have a family that is overprotective to the point of suffocation,
I know they will not leave me alone to take the fall, but I do not get to try something new and adventurous.
Do I complain about being held back from flying, or should I feel safe that I will never fall?

There is an ocean of opportunities for the talented and the educated.
When my job does not appreciate my talent, and I can only get this mediocre job,
Do I complain about my talent that goes waste, or should I be thankful to even have a job that pays?

I have the drive and desire to succeed.
I lack the guidance and wisdom needed to move ahead and succeed.
Do I complain about the absence of guiding light or succumb to the desire to succeed by any means?

I have my life planned out for me and well-wishers who will arm-twist all my hurdles.
I am standing at the top of the podium getting applause for a victory that I did not win,
Do I complain that I did not get to work my way towards a victory, or should I just stand and soak in all the ill-gotten success?

Weekend Adventure With A Rat

This weekend started like every other weekend. On Friday evening, I caught up with all the news and relaxed on my bed. One news article was playing on my mind. Due to recent weather changes in Australia, they have seen an unprecedented wave of mice infestation. The news article showed images of teams of mice running helter-skelter in barns and fields. Frankly, it scared the daylights outta me. I was taken back to my childhood when I encountered a small rat at school, and in its attempt to escape the room, the rat ran up my teacher’s leg. The incident took place in our music class, it was filled with different kinds of instruments, and the whole scene was complete pandemonium with 20 children, a teacher and a rat running around.

I went to sleep with these thoughts and woke up early the next day to see my nightmare realised. As soon as we opened the backyard door, a small rat ran into our house to escape the rain. As soon as we saw it run into the house, the chaos began. My maid, mother and I were jumping up and down, trying to escape the path of the rat and, hopefully, scare it away. But the rat was here to stay and hid behind the shelves. We needed a game plan to tackle the rat, and we needed it quickly.

Firstly we closed all the other rooms in the house to contain the rat in one place. Since it still was early in the morning, we could not run to the store to get a rat trap or those sticky pads. We each took a broom and started to scour each room to scare it and corner it. After half a day of frantic searching and running around, we managed to herd the rat into the balcony of our bedroom and forced it down the rainwater drain. We immediately blocked the drainpipe to make sure it did not come back up again. Finally, we were able to breathe a sigh of relief. We ended up tired, dusty, and hungry, but the house was once again rat-free.

Though we are drained out, the rat forced us to reorganise the house and remove all waste and useless stuff that was lying around. We did a quick cleanup under all the beds, corners, shelves etc. We did this to ensure that there were no hiding places for these cretins anymore. What should have been a relaxing weekend turned into a home cleaning mission all because of a rat.

The Loved One

Hello everyone!! I want to thank you all for your continued love and support of the blogs that I post. Encouraged by your kind support, I have recently tried my hand at short story writing.

I have written a short story about someone I hold dear in my life. As is my usual style, I wrote the story to record and share incidents and lessons that teach us something. This story is of someone who has taught me many valuable life lessons with love and fun.

The short story is a part of an anthology with 20 stories on the theme of loved ones. You can buy and read my story and the others as an e-book or a paperback version too. Both are available to order online at the links attached.

INKFEATHERS STORE

Inkfeathers Paperback:
https://inkfeathers.com/shop/anthologies/the-loved-one/

Inkfeathers eBook:
https://inkfeathers.com/shop/ebooks/the-loved-one-ebook/

AMAZON PAPERBACK

Amazon India
https://www.amazon.in/dp/8194932459

Amazon.com
https://www.amazon.com/dp/8194932459

Amazon UK
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/8194932459

Amazon CA
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/8194932459

AMAZON E KINDLE

Kindle IN
https://www.amazon.in/dp/B096RZ7FRW

Kindle US
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B096RZ7FRW

Kindle UK
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B096RZ7FRW

Please support me in my maiden attempt at short stories by ordering your book today. Thank you all and, I hope to receive your continued love and support.

How Effective Is Cancelling A Person?

Cancel culture is the latest buzzword nowadays. It is a way to call our small and big celebrities on their behaviour, views, misdeeds etc. Recently, we have seen several famous people who were cancelled for various reasons like their past tweets, behaviour, views and opinions etc. I became aware of this cancellation culture during the very public dispute between Amber Heard and Johnny Depp. While Johnny Depp was dropped from major movie franchises, many were calling for the cancellation of Amber Heard. This was when I became aware of the act of cancelling celebrities and what it entails.

Many famous stars and public figures were cancelled in the past years, for example, actors Lea Michele, Chris Pratt, Ellen DeGeneres, Shia LeBeouf, author J K Rowling, Piers Morgan from Good Morning Britain, YouTubers Jeffree Starr, Shane Dawson, James Charles, David Dobrik and his vlog squad, musicians like Marilyn Manson, Lil Nas X, and many more.

Before I start telling you about my grouse with this cancel culture, I would like to explicitly state that I do not condone the wrong deeds of any of these celebrities, YouTubers, musicians etc. Many of them deserve harsher punishments for their actions. In fact, I am happy to see some of these famous personalities get their comeuppance.

Having made that clear, I also want to question what we aim to achieve by cancelling them. Some of the people listed above have done real-world damage, for which they should be legally prosecuted in court. Whether it be bullying, slandering others image, perjury, harassment, endangering other lives, harassing minors etc. When one has done such heinous acts, is cancelling them an apt punishment. Do they not deserve a stricter legal binding punishment? 

All these people who were cancelled were public figures, celebrities that thrive on publicity and staying in the public eye. So it makes sense to cancel them and cut off the celebrity worship that they enjoy so much. It is like cutting off oxygen for some of them, yet we also have people who thrive on negative publicity. People like James Charles and Jeffree Starr have made an art out of issuing apologies every time they are caught and continuing with their degenerate behaviour. People like Piers Morgan and JK Rowling do not care for their cancellation. They continue on with life as if nothing happened.

So that brings us back to the very pertinent question of, ‘How effective is cancel culture?’

It Is Time To Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Often in life, we all reach a point where we are unhappy with the way things are going, yet we are unwilling to try something new. We feel that the known devil is better than an unknown angel. We might have faced many struggles before yet, we find it daunting to work our way out of this predicament. We pacify ourselves that the difficulties don’t outweigh the rewards yet. These are all classic symptoms of getting stuck in a comfort zone.

This comfort zone might be in our relationships, workplace, the projects we choose or life in general. On whichever front, it is just as detrimental to a person to stick to their comfort zone. It forces us to settle for less than the best. Even though we know we can be better and achieve more by taking a risk, it does not matter. Our fear of taking a chance just dulls our senses and distorts our objectivity. Comfort zones are like quicksands that appear harmless until they have pulled us in and we are stuck too deep to fight it.

Our fear to try something new, the inertia to change, the pessimistic attitude towards risk, and so on can hurt us on many levels. They are not just hurting us emotionally and financially but also psychologically. Many people waste their life stuck in the same relationship or job because they are scared to spread their wings.

As with all my posts, this one is also inspired by personal experience. Earlier, in my job, I was so comfortable in my own misery that I stopped seeing it as hell. I made excuses for bad managers, horrible hours of work and less pay. I perceived them to be industry standards. I felt enjoyable work is a myth, and everybody hates their job, so I would just suck it up and carry on.

I have since changed my job and even changed professions. I do not claim that life is better. Yet, I remember why I took the decision to change and that it was a valid concern. So as long as I know that my reason to change, I will not regret jumping out of my comfort zone.

There is no easy way to get out of this. One just needs to find the determination to change. The best way to fight your comfort zone is to keep pushing and challenging yourself. Having a loyal support group to help you change can be a big help.

At the same time, never forget why you have decided to change. As long as the reason is valid, we will always find the strength to keep fighting. Sometimes an honest and rude shock from reality can also wake us up. There are many ways to help you recognise the trap of comfort zones. We just need to be willing to take a step ahead.

Revisiting A Long Forgotten Childhood Memory

In the last week of February, my husband and I were driving in the streets of Ironshore. Ironshore is an upscale community in the outskirts of Montego Bay, Jamaica. There are some beautiful houses in this neighbourhood. Anyway! As we drove towards the A1 highway, my husband suddenly exclaimed, “Seema chintha gubbalu!”. I had no clue what he was referring to.

He stopped the car by the sidewalk and asked if I saw them on the tree nearby. I explained to him that I am hearing that word for the first time. He pointed to a tall tree in a piece of wasteland by the road. Before I could get a good glimpse of the tree, he got out of the car and walked towards the tree.

He picked a delicate, pink and white pod that was curled up and appeared to have burst open. He showed it to me and said that these trees were commonly found in and around his village in India. He ate them a lot as a child.

The scientific name of this fruit is Pithecellobium dulce. I did a little research to know that these trees a commonly found in Asia, Central America, Mexico and South America. It is called by different names in different regions. The bark, fruit, seeds of this tree are used to treat various ailmentsKaushik V. Kulkarni and Varsha R. Jamakhandi from the College of Pharmacy in India have explained a few interesting facts about the tree. The uses of Pithecellobium dulce are described in the Journal of Pharmacognosy and Phytochemistry. It can be accessed at this website:

https://www.phytojournal.com/archives/2018/vol7issue2/PartJ/7-1-390-353.pdf.

The pods of Seema Chintha burst open on the tree when they become ripe and ready for eating. They taste sweet when ripe yet have a mild sour taste at the same time. The best way to describe the flavour is like chewing on fresh rose petals that were sweet. After eating the first one, I couldn’t stop. I ate them all, one after another.

After picking a bunch of pods from the tree, we separated the delicate white fruit from the pod, removed the black seeds and washed them thoroughly before devouring them. I couldn’t help notice the delicate white flowers hanging down. They were so beautiful and feathery that I decided not to touch them. Bees and wasps were hovering around too.
For now, I am going to leave you with this last picture of this Seema Chintakaya. For my husband, this was a wonderful memory brought back from his childhood.

Wise Words Are Like Pure Gold

In an earlier post, I had introduced you to the poems of Yogi Vemana. This 17th-century ascetic had written extensively on morality, ethics, human pathos and spread this wisdom through verses known as Vemana Satakam or Vemana Padhyalu.

The current verse is another pearl of wisdom from him:
Alpudepudu palkunadambaramuganu
sajjanundu balku callaganu
kancumroginatlu kanakambu mroguna
visvadabhirama vinura Vema !

In this verse, Vemana talks about how an unintelligent person can fool others with his loud voice and grand plans. His words are extravagant, but they hold little water. However, a wise man speaks softly, without any drama. His words are few, yet the meaning and impact are profound.

He compares the words of an unwise speaker to a brass pot that makes a lot of noise when disturbed. At the same time, pure gold may appear similar to brass, but it makes no noise.

Why The General Disdain For Rules

Breaking rules is generally considered as one of the traits of the ‘cool’ kids. The more disdain you show towards rules and authority, the cooler you are considered. Even in urban parlance, ‘goody two shoes’ is a term meant as an insult, and bad boy/girl attitude is adored.

When it was all fun and games, even I agreed with this concept. I saw people skip classes, flout rules, talkback, and just be all around unruly. I would laugh it off and thought it was fun.

The COVID-19 pandemic has highlighted many weaknesses in human society. The general disdain for following rules is at the foremost. This attitude for rule-breaking and being rebellious was considered cool before the pandemic. However, the need of the hour is disciplined citizens who are what the world lacks the most today.

As a child, we were taught to patiently stand in a queue in school and wait our turn. I would scoff at it and break the line when no one was watching. But now, I see people doing it while standing in a queue to get vaccinated. It makes my blood boil.

When Mahatma Gandhi started the civil disobedience movement during the freedom struggle, everyone praised the idea for being a non-violent way of protesting against the rules laid by the British government. When I see people willfully not wearing masks, disregarding all the rules set down by the government for our safety, I do not see civil disobedience. I see anarchism.

Anarchy is a fun concept when everything is peaceful with no pandemic, calamity or impending danger. During difficult times, anarchy never helps. Discipline, working together and following the rules is the only way out of a difficult situation. I hope people recognise and snip the anarchical behaviour, at least now.

Mother – A Wondrous Angel

We recently celebrated Mothers Day on May 9th. I wanted to do something special for my mother on that day. Since we could not take her out for dinner or get her any gifts due to the Covid 19 situation, I thought I will give her a break and handle her workload for the day. I thought that was equivalent to a day off at a resort if she does not have to cook and clean all day. I was in for a surprise.

All through the day, my mother kept interfering with my work. She was not able to relax and enjoy her holiday. My mom was constantly following me around the house as I worked. She was not relaxing in front of the TV or pursuing any of her hobbies. I thought that she might be worried that I am not doing a good job.

When I asked her what she would like to eat, my mom listed stuff that dad or I enjoy eating. She would insist on cooking it herself as a thank you for doing the housework. I was confused and told her that this was her mothers day gift. She should not thank me for it. My mother and I ended up arguing about her reason for not relaxing and enjoying the holiday.

By the end of the day, I realized that the whole idea was causing damage rather than being a gift. I sat her down and asked her what her problem was. I see that she could not relax even for a day and would interfere at every step. I gently prodded to see if she did not appreciate the gift. The answer she gave me was an insight into how a mother thinks.

She said she did not want a holiday from the housework though she appears to complain about it. She said that she complains so that we would work along with her. She felt she has a connection and communication line with us while we do the work. She was following me around the house and interfering in the work, only to start a conversation with me. She had no particular favourites in her mind because all the foods that we, her children, love bring back memories of us as kids. Every time she cooked my favourite dish, she reminisced on an incident where I was happy. That made her happy.

A mother doesn’t want a holiday from her responsibilities. She just wants her children to connect back with her in a way we did when we were young. She wants to feel relevant in our lives, especially now that we have become independent. Knowing this, I asked her for a redo of the gift. I promised to help her in the kitchen whenever I can. That way, she can teach me recipes I already know. I would help her clean the house, and she can teach me the importance of cleanliness all over again. This would be the best gift I could think of.

Passing Your Time During Lockdown

The first lockdown due to the pandemic has been hard to adjust to. The second wave of coronavirus has reached a new high, and the second lockdown has been announced in many places. All the travel restrictions are back in place. Most tourist places and recreational centres are closed, and parties are a big no.

I might sound like I’m complaining. But I agree that these measures are needed to curb the spread of the virus. I am just worried about passing my time during this pandemic. 

The last time, I revisited some of my old hobbies, like crocheting and gardening. 

I also learnt how to cook. I made pasta with Alfredo sauce, baked a cake, among a couple of other recipes. I wasn’t very successful, but I got the basics of cooking right.

I guess this time around, I need to try my hand at drawing. That has been an art form that I am not good at. In my previous post, I promised to learn from my sister, who is good at it. Let’s hope I can manage it this time.

Respond, Don’t React

How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.
-Wayne Dyer

I read this quote of Wayne Dyer, an American author and motivational speaker. Initially, it seems like a simple statement about life in general. It, in fact, reminded me of another management lesson of how we should always respond and not react.

Both these quotes convey the same lesson, i.e., we should watch how we behave while responding to what is done to us. We should observe if our reaction is a knee jerk response to everything or if we understand the situation and reply accordingly. Many times, it leads to either resolving conflict or aggravating a simple misunderstanding into an all-out war.

Coming back to Wayne Dyer’s quote, when we are in a situation, there are several ways to handle them. Some are knee jerk responses, while some are strategic moves planned to build a brighter future. Some may be conniving schemes that create destruction. The situation we land in may not be our karma or our destiny. However, our response to this unforeseen situation will create our karma. If we handle it gracefully and peacefully, we build good karma. By taking out our anger and seeking revenge, we only create bad karma.

To better explain it, I will narrate a small anecdote. It occurred many years ago, but it highlighted this quote.

One day, my friend and I entered the bank and met an old acquaintance. This lady lived in our neighbourhood previously, and she was notorious for her unhinged rants at passers-by. I saw the same lady verbally abusing another person. This person was thoroughly embarrassed in front of all the bank employees and customers, so she ran out crying as we all watched in shock. Now the lady saw me and started abusing me. She recognised my friend and spoke ill of me to her. But I ignored her as if I had no recollection of her. As a result, I did not react to her abuses, turning my head and going about my business. My friend acknowledged her, and while calmy speaking to her, she led the lady out of the bank. Once the lady went out, everything went back to normal. Everyone in the bank praised my friend for handling the situation. They appreciated me for not fighting back.

The lady created a situation where three different people were embarrassed. We each responded differently. The first person reacted emotionally and ran out. I ignored her and carried on with my work. My friend intervened intelligently by removing her from the bank and stopping any further conflict. The lady’s behaviour was her own karma, but each of us created our own karma while we handled the situation. Thereby, one ended up in tears, and another (my friend) ended up as the hero. Isn’t this thought-provoking?